<< sort of like steel magnolias, only more proactive >>
2003-06-06 - 9:38 a.m.

How many doughnuts do you have to eat before you've eaten a ridiculous number of doughnuts? Like, is three ridiculous? Four? I ask strictly for information, of course.

You guys, one of the ex-boyfriends called me at four o'clock this morning. Four in the morning! I didn't answer, but he successfully jolted me out of a sound, REM sleep. I didn't get back to sleep until about 10 minutes before it was time for me to get up. I just emailed him the ex-boyfriend letter, posted here a couple of days ago but until now never actually read by any of the offending ex-boyfriends. (I did take out the mentions of the other boyfriends.) I hope this doesn't make me sound like a total bitch, but I really think it's my past lack of bitchiness that has been doing me in here. I need to be fiercer. I need to get in a few punches for team RDG.

That reminds me, I'm thinking of getting a tattoo. I know 27 is a little old to get started on the whole rebellious body-altering thing, but what can I say? I'm a late bloomer. Besides, I want to do something to celebrate my (hopefully permanent) exit from Corporate America this fall.

I once saw a nature show on carnivorous orchids (this does come back around to the tattoo), and they were really amazing: not only do they trap and eat bugs, they sort of do a little dance that attracts the bugs, and then they physically shove the bugs into their little flower-mouths. So that's what I would like to get tattooed on me, a carnivorous orchid: they look passive and they'd make a pretty, or at least interesting tattoo, but in fact they are not to be fucked with. Sort of like a steel magnolia, you know, only more proactive. Of course, you wouldn't be able to tell by looking at the tattoo that the flowers were killers. What do you think? Too silly? Too ideologically linked to an early Julia Roberts movie?

I'm still pretty flexible on the tattoo issue right now. I understand it hurts.

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