<< men are like a fine wine >>
2005-08-02 - 10:37 a.m.

I got a job! Well, it's only a temporary position, but the woman from HR told me that they basically wanted to keep me working for the city library system until something permanent opened up so that I wouldn't get hired elsewhere. Off course, there are no guarantees, but still. Exciting. The job itself is ideal--I'll be the teen librarian in a branch just a mile or two from my house.

The job at the Airplane Company has been pretty depressing. For one bizarre thing, there is nothing inside the building to indicate that time has passed beyond 1976. There is lots of bad abstract hotel art, for instance, in shades of peach and pale blue, and those fake plastic walls. Even the people look strangely dated. And the internet browser of choice at Airplane Company? Netscape. Netscape! And they wonder why Airbus is pulling ahead.

For another bizarre thing, although I theoretically work at the law library, the real truth is that there is no library, due to the dismantling of the law group, which is now spread out at offices all over the country. The "library" now consists of one tiny shelf of books and a lone librarian who, as far as I can tell, spends all her time maintaining the electronic database subscriptions that she originally ordered years ago. My job is to sort through stacks of invoices for said databases and try to figure out what goes with what, whether things have been paid and if not, to whom payment might be offered, etc.etc. It's really more Joe vs. the Volcano--or even 9-5, without the jerky boss--than Office Space.

Possibly the most depressing thing about this job is my cube. I am filling in for a woman named Sandy, who is out on medical leave and is apparently a tiny gnomelike person. My clues were the pictures of herself at her desk, the fact that several people have mentioned to me that although I am small, I am a veritable giant compared with Sandy, and finally, the fact that there is a plaque on my faux wall made out to "Her Shortness Sandy." Every single square inch of this space is filled with inspirational or adorable knick knacks and whatnots. Here is a very small sample of the quotations taped to my monitor, pinned to the wall, or glued to the desk itself:

Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall NEVER cease to be amused.
Men are like a fine wine. They start out as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.


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