Here's a parental story for you. But first, the backstory.
Before my parents came, I not only cleaned my house from floor to ceiling, I tried to enact total Parent-Proofing. You know what I mean. I took down my copy of "Cunt" from the bookshelf in the living room. I removed my old paper journals from the bedside table. I made sure there were no prophylactics in obvious places. I hid all of my copies of "Satan-Worshippers Weekly." I tried. I really did.
And now, the actual story.
My dad was sick this week, so the other day I handed him a box of Sudafed caplets. He took a nap. Later, as we were walking into Safeco Field for the M's game, my mom got a little bit ahead of us, and my dad whispered, "I have a funny story for you. Well, it's sort of funny."
"Really? What?"
"Later."
So when Bob and I went to get hotdogs, I was expecting a hilarious story about my mom, but instead he said, "You know, I popped two of those pills you gave me, and they really didn't do anything. So I got them back out and looked at them and you know what? They weren't Sudafed caplets at all.
They were your birth control pills."
Oh.
Shit.
**
**
The parentals liked the Mariner's game, but I'm starting to believe that all those Barons games they took me to as a kid really were for my own good or something, like church or visiting those relatives we don't really like. Anyway, the M's creamed the A's; it was a victory for the middle of the alphabet such as the sports world had not seen in years.
**
**
We went to Rainier. They were not quite as overwhelmed with love as I felt that they should be, but I guess that's not really fair. I mean, they liked it. They thought it was very pretty. But I fell in love with that damn mountain the way you fall in love with a person, completely head over heels. Of course, my parents are much more well-traveled than I was when I first got to Rainier; they've been all over Australia and New Zealand and the Wild Wooly West. I had barely ever crossed the Mississippi, and my trip to Europe in college included only limited amounts of hiking/scenery, I am sorry to say.
But still. A little enthusiasm, parents. Did you see the glacier? That's a glacier. Also, the wildflowers? Like a rainbow? Those are nice, right?
We did have a great time, though. We hiked and hiked. The only sad story is that my body is now covered in 9,743 deer fly bites, which I think are a nice complement to the bruises and the bizarre, stripey sunburn on my back from where I missed with the sunscreen. I was completely covered in scary poisonous insecticide the whole time, but it made no difference.
I am delicious.
**
**
I talk way more Southern when my parents are around, ya'll.
**
**
As much as I love my parents, I'll be glad to sleep in my own bed again; the couch is getting a wee bit hard. I think I might try to sneak out to the USE show at the Croc after Bob and Kathy's bedtime. Danny said he would come pick me up, with a corsage. Then he could meet my parents and we would take pictures and Danny and I would take off in the limo.Remind me to pick up a boutonniere on the way home.
Design by Soapboxdiner, modified by Red Dirt Girl.
Copyright � 2002-2005.